Victor hasn’t come back home from his parents’ yet. He doesn’t know when he’ll be coming back because his car’s distributor cap or whatever is fucked and can’t drive back home it until his car is repaired. He doesn’t know when that will be as the place that he and his father are ordering the part from hasn’t received it yet.

I’ve spent the past few days at my parents’ and came back to my apartment this afternoon. I don’t want to be at my parents’ and I don’t want to be here.

There’s always fighting at my parents’ house. Whether its amongst my sisters and I or between my mother and myself. We fight even over the littlest of things. We may not fight all the time but I’m really not in the mood for fighting. And I don’t want to be in this apartment by myself because I don’t want to be alone. But I also don’t want to stay away from here for too long because I fear that some dumb cunts will break in and rob us of our valuables.

I’m not feeling good at all, physically and emotionally. I was feeling ill before Victor left so I was already feeling a little depressed because I can’t stand feeling ill. Then when I found out on Thursday night that Victor wasn’t coming home on Friday, I got more depressed. And I still am because I have no idea when he’s coming home. I am so used to having him around every night; even if he’s in the other room watching the television while I’m asleep in the bedroom. Just having him around makes me feel… Safe.

Oh and him not calling me to let me know what’s going on makes it worse.

Just like when I had called him on Thursday afternoon (after waiting all day for him to come home) to find out when he will be coming home, was I only notified about the situation with his car. You know, it wouldn’t kill him just to give me a quick call to let me know what is going on. It would have made a big difference if he had done so in the first place…

I could go on and on about this whole situation but I rather not do so. I just lost interest in ranting about it. I’m going to put my energy towards something else.

I hope he comes home soon!