Victor hasn’t come back home from his parents’ yet. He doesn’t know when he’ll be coming back because his car’s distributor cap or whatever is fucked and can’t drive back home it until his car is repaired. He doesn’t know when that will be as the place that he and his father are ordering the part from hasn’t received it yet.
I’ve spent the past few days at my parents’ and came back to my apartment this afternoon. I don’t want to be at my parents’ and I don’t want to be here.
There’s always fighting at my parents’ house. Whether its amongst my sisters and I or between my mother and myself. We fight even over the littlest of things. We may not fight all the time but I’m really not in the mood for fighting. And I don’t want to be in this apartment by myself because I don’t want to be alone. But I also don’t want to stay away from here for too long because I fear that some dumb cunts will break in and rob us of our valuables.
I’m not feeling good at all, physically and emotionally. I was feeling ill before Victor left so I was already feeling a little depressed because I can’t stand feeling ill. Then when I found out on Thursday night that Victor wasn’t coming home on Friday, I got more depressed. And I still am because I have no idea when he’s coming home. I am so used to having him around every night; even if he’s in the other room watching the television while I’m asleep in the bedroom. Just having him around makes me feel… Safe.
Oh and him not calling me to let me know what’s going on makes it worse.
Just like when I had called him on Thursday afternoon (after waiting all day for him to come home) to find out when he will be coming home, was I only notified about the situation with his car. You know, it wouldn’t kill him just to give me a quick call to let me know what is going on. It would have made a big difference if he had done so in the first place…
I could go on and on about this whole situation but I rather not do so. I just lost interest in ranting about it. I’m going to put my energy towards something else.
I hope he comes home soon!
Eskom shut off the town’s power several times today all together. It even happened earlier while I was writing a blog post and because I didn’t save it, I lost it. Everything that I had typed! When the power came back on, I turned on my computer and started typing out my lost post all over again. But not even ten minutes after the power was turned on, it went out and I lost what I typed out, again!
The post that I was typing out was an update to the post, “Drama, Drama, Joy“. But I guess that I’ll just type out that post again sometime this week because I’m just not in the mood to do it now.
Oh how I love hate you when this happens, Eskom!
I haven’t been sleeping as much as I should over the last several days. Waking up at eight o’clock in the morning and staying up until four o’clock the next morning is not doing me any good. But at times I can’t help it. I am either tired but can’t get to sleep at all or I’m just not tired at all. Then I stay awake till I feel physically ill, crawl into bed and only then can I get some sleep.
I plan on going to bed no later than midnight tonight. Even if I don’t feel like sleeping I’m going to lay myself in the bed and lay there until I fall asleep. I have to. I don’t want my body getting more used to this than it already is.
I’ve been tinkering with my K2 style. I changed the font of the headings and edited the comments template along with some CSS to create a speech bubble effect. Those of you who commented before I uploaded my new comments page style will know what it looked like before. Let me know what you think about it. I quite like it.
I haven’t been feeling too well recently and the summer heat isn’t helping me out one bit. All I want to is lay down with the windows open and sleep while the cool wind brushes against my skin. I might just go do that after I’m done typing this blog post.
Life has been uneasy, for lack of a better word. Victor and I have been fighting more these days than ever; over little things mostly. But you’d think we were fighting over something of more importance and not of something so simple.
The other time was when Victor had promised that he would help me clean the apartment by sweeping the floors and then I would wash them and do everything else. This was to be done before we’d go to my mother’s place to use her washing machine then make it back home before his friends, Riaan and Tanya came over for that weekend. But that morning he decides to go all the way to Makro instead of the mall close by to get Riaan’s birthday gift and gets back home much later than he should have… That was when I had just done all the cleaning by myself. But he walked in the door with a bottle of bubble bath and the part one of Heroes season one on DVD for me, just to say sorry…
He’s such a softie and cares way too much. I love him.
On Wednesday night I prepared a couple of Woolworths sweet & sour noodle boxes and some wonton wrapped prawns, served with sweet chili sauce. It was delicious!
I just couldn’t believe that I struggled so much when using the chopsticks… I was pretty good when I first ate with chopsticks, but now it’s like I never held a pair in my hands, ha!
I need to practice, I think…
My bed is calling out my name, I’m going to have a nap now and deal with the dirty dishes in my sink when I wake up because I really can’t be bothered to do so at this very moment.
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